Why Don’t You Do Her Hair?
I often get this question in regards to my daughter’s hair. Most of the time it comes from older women who think they are “schooling me” on how to be a better mom. Or it comes from women who don’t even take care of their own hair, BUT, I digress. Anywho, I thought I’d address it in a blog post.
My Luna was born with a head full of thick silky coils. As she began to grow and changed so did the texture of her hair. Her coils began to spring and bounce just like she did. I told myself that I would let her hair do its thang and be free.
Once her tresses got to a certain length, people started telling me I should do something to her hair. At first, I didn’t think twice about it. But then, strangers even shared their two cents. This made me doubt my choice.
Not being firm in my decision to keep her fro, I began to manipulate and tame her mane. I forced her hair into small pigtails and adorned them with barrettes. Just like all little black girls hair SHOULD be right?!
Luna hated it! She would constantly pull and tug at her hair…leaving her hair looking unkept. Then I would get those “so you not gonna to do your baby’s hair” looks along with smart remarks. These comments started to make me feel inadequate because they were often followed by a list of other things I was doing “wrong” in motherhood.
After a few months, I noticed her once coily tresses began to dry up, thin, and shed.
Eventually, she had almost no hair except for a patch right in the middle of her head. Once this happened, here came the critics saying that I wasn’t taking care of her hair.
When her hair fell out, I’ll admit I was a little bitter. I would look at other babies whose hair was flourishing and get frustrated that I couldn’t get Luna’s to grow.
I grew weary of the remarks about her hair. It was time to take charge and reclaim her crown!
I stopped listening to everyone’s criticism about how I should style my daughter’s tresses and became firm in my choice.
All I did was keep her hair moisturized and let it do its thing!
Doing this enabled her fro to flourish like never before!!
I’m teaching my daughter to love the texture of her hair at an early age. The goal is for her to be comfortable with the versatility of her hair and love it in every form. No talk of “nappy” or “bad” hair. Eventually she’ll have the mentality that healthy hair IS good hair. She’ll know for herself… my hair is beautiful, it’s my crown!